No Harm in Watching
by im a bunny
Summary: Although the day in the dungeon was when the two were first properly introduced he had known her all her life. In reflections of his dreams, he saw her. Even free he still loves to watch her. AxI
1. Chapter 1

**No Harm In Watching : Opening**

Although the day in the dungeon was when the two were first properly introduced he had known her all her life. In reflections of his dreams, he saw her. Even free he still loves to watch her.

Rated: M – Just in Case, for adult situations and underage Integra's.

From the outside of a nondescript enclosure green weathered roofs of a building could be seen if standing on the other side of the street. The closest neighbors where about half a mile away in any direction from the surrounding wall that encompassed a few acres of what use to be farm land. A hundred years ago this massive estate had not been so out of place in the country side, but as the country grew making way for the middle class the quaint home, if you could call it a home, became an oddity in an age where nobility and their property were slowly becoming relics.

Needless to say the building was a little queer.

Stories of illicit activity, drug cartels and secret societies could not help but pass over the lips of residents curious to know what was inside. The foreboding of it only furthered to spark the imaginations of the neighbors, especially when they first moved in. People often went for walks down the only road that lead to the manor in hopes of getting a better look at what was behind the rampart. All and all they'd find their journey uneventful their elaborate images fizzled. Soon they'd come to realize it was just a house, a very large house, made of stone. Boring really in it's simplicity and lack of decoration. They would chide themselves for ever having found anything remotely interesting in the home. Over time they learned to just let their curiosity go.

The rest of what the neighbors dubbed "The Compound" was surrounded on either side by a small stretch of woods with one entrance blocked by a contemporary iron gate. -At least it looked iron to the unaware bystander that might pass by. In reality the gate was reinforced steal, capable of withstanding a grenade blast, strong enough to buy the occupants inside time encase of an attack.- During the day sleek expensive cars slunk their way behind the gate. On occasion the not so discreet helicopter would appear. Despite it's peculiarity and occasional appearance by an armed guard the compound was ordinary, blending into the background.

However when the sun went down that was when the compound seemed to wake up. At night hurried footfalls clacked across stone, sounds of large vehicles rumbled on the street shaking the pavement and forks at the dinner table. Then just as quickly as it started it died down and the families went back to their meal. - it was not their place to question, life taught them to be cautious...so they fained indifference.- The residents really had nothing to complain about, the compound had been there long before they ever moved in and the area was relatively cheap given the location. If the occasional rattle was the only cost to living here, they'd deal.

To one observer though the house had been unbearably quiet for years. Yes the occasional call to arms rang out. Soldiers marched around the courtyard, or practiced in the field, tanks rolled by, but nothing exciting. Nothing note worthy enough to capture his attention for more than a second. What he wouldn't give for a good war or some form of Armageddon to stir the blood. The above world was so hushed, becoming lazy and fat under their delusions of peace. Soon though humanity would be reminded of the horrors they thought only existed in illusions. Not because the creature felt some eminent evil or because it had been written in the stars. To him it was inevitable, he knew man and the tranquility they sought never lasted long. It was only a matter of time... the humans had probably forgot all about him and his rein. Even alive his story had begun to weave into fiction, stuff of mortal fantasy and nightmares. Oh well, he'd just have to wait and in his prison he had nothing but time and his memories to keep him company. A small twisted smile tugged at the corners of his lips from the reminder of the glorious battles once fought here. However the house he remembered grew quieter by the day. Or maybe years, because who knew how long it had been since the last time he heard anything remotely interesting coming from the land above.

Then one day a sound rose above all the rest, seeping into pleasant oblivion, to wake the undead that laid dormant and waiting in the bowels of the house. A remarkable sound really to have caught the attention of one normally so withdrawn. Remarkable in the sense that this clamor did not belong in a home turned fortress. So unique the evil that slumbered could not help but pull himself away from his darkened dreams. His sensitive ears so long used to hearing the shrieking howls of those dead or dieing; he almost did not recognize the alien noise as it chimed in his skull. It was refreshing what now reached him breaking through the monotony of the day. Sweeter than any symphony, more mysterious than any scream in the night...the sound of a baby crying. He could not remember a time ever hearing a baby cry.

The creature did not know it but this event only proved to confirm how extraordinary the infant would be. With tiny lungs she wailed and demanded to be heard. She was hungry and could not be made to wait a moment longer. No matter what the age as long as she had air to breath her authority would be recognized.

Without hesitation the beast obeyed the call. From the fractal reflections of crystal and glass that made up the babies mobile Alucard got his first glimpse of the child he'd one day call master.

A/N : Originally this was going to be a one shot but I could not stop rewritting the dang thing. So I've broken it up into shorter sections to help get it up faster.


	2. Chapter 2

No Harm In Watching

Rated: M – Just in Case, for adult situations and underage Integra's. Only not in this part...Wait, I promise it gets more M'ish.

* * *

Now time passes differently for those that call themselves immortal. Past, present and future ooze into one. Alucard had only stopped to take a nap, when the soft cries of someone he did not recognize alerted him to misfortune. The wails were beautifully silken filled with innocence and heart wrenching sorrow. A part of him was mad he had not been the cause of such sweet tears.

Peering out the limpid waters, deep in the corner of a granite wash basin so as not to be detected, he watched as a child with soft hay colored hair sniffled and mewled her pain. Her eyes were puffy due to prolonged crying and her cheeks flushed with grief. She was using a tissue to wipe the snot from her nose.

Immediately Alucard recognized the daughter of a Hellsing. The same baby that had called him a moment ago. Still so small...A tender morsel of a thing, a snack, easily gobbled up. To his eyes she was exactly the same but if he had any interest in the passage of time Alucard would have to guess the baby turned toddler was nearing four.

A short nap really in the grand scheme of things.

From his perspective in his dream scape Alucard had to look up at the small child from his place in the basin, since he was unable to extend his reach to the forefront. One wrong move, or a change in the light and the girl might see the hell eyes buried deep beneath the surface. That would not do at all it was no good having his source of entertainment run. So he stayed still content to watch.

Big doe eyes set in a stern stubborn face looked down into the water bowl. Even with the stool she had to stand on tiptoes, her little body wobbled with the extra effort. Her father only allowed small mirrors in the bathrooms for reasons she was told she was to young to know; however she had been ordered to turn them around when she entered the room. Far to young to understand the complexity of an adult mind and ever the obedient child the little girl did as she was instructed. Today though she had to ensure she was presentable and used the reflecting waters to check on her appearance.

Sniffling the little girl frowned at what she saw; to say she was a mess was an understatement. Tufts of hair where falling out of her braid and her nose had taken on the color of a beat. She didn't think she'd ever be ready to face the crowd outside... No amount a primping could cover up her red rimed eyes.

With a forceful blow of her nose she tried to get her sobs under control.

Resonating on the other side Alucard noted her tiny frame spoke of grief and misery far to profound to be held by a child. The girl carried the weary stance of someone going on a hundred and five. Little shoulders wilted against a burden only she knew. Alucard smiled... Slowly the world was taking away her innocence, piece by preciouses piece, yet her clenched jaw told she was fighting to hold on. It was deliciously human.

Hellsing's daughter cradled her hand near to her chest, like a cherished doll. Petite fist clenched tight until the knuckles turned white. With shaking limbs she brought it over the bowl. It appeared her small appendage was the cause of her tears. Opening it Alucard saw the reason for her direst. Across her palm laid a nasty gash running diagonally from thumb to wrist. Beads of ruby swelled then rolled to the awaiting depths, landing against the water in brilliant displays of crimson. His vision blurred an alluring shade of rose as he watched the tiny droplets ripple in his pool.

Despite him self Alucard found him licking his lips, stopping to chuckle at his own foolishness when he realized the futileness of it all. Not surprisingly they where dry with a texture resembling a fine sand paper, even his tongue held no moisture, his carcass a useless and discarded husk. There was not an ounce of moisture to be found in his body. Quiet comical really, he thought to himself. How he wished these images were not just in his minds eye. To extend his parched tongue and lap the soothing rain of her life's fluid. It had been so long...

"You will not cry..." The little Hellsing said with gritted teeth; taking the creature from his reverie.

Blinking Alucard pondered her words and gave a mental shrug. A strange statement from a child.

"This pain is nothing, and will pass." She closed her eyes and took one deep breath, her nose snorting unbecomingly. When all the mucus and racking sobs had stopped Little Hellsing opened clear blue eyes and glared intently at her own reflection in the water. "Remember this, never let them see you cry." Her words were an order meant to be followed. Unaware she spoke these words to Alucard, his eyes locking with hers in the murky pool. He wondered who the them was she was referring too.

It never occurred to Alucard to wonder what kind of woman would give birth to such a strange child. Since time held no meaning for him and decades blended into one; In his mind the little girl had always been there with him. Even before his imprisonment, before the stones where laid that built his tomb, long before the first Hellsing held a stake to the chest of one such as he. Little Hellsing had always been waiting for him and that was enough for him. Who cared where she came from?

If Alucard had cared to wonder about such trivial things, he would have known that the woman who had carried such an exceptional child had died. Thus leaving her in a sea of men, unsympathetic to the cries of children and resiliently hardened. Not even her father had shed a tear for his beloved wife. Instead Arthur had taken his daughter aside during his wifes wake and brushed the flowing tears from her pink cheeks finally whispering in her ear to be strong.

'Not everyone here can be counted as a friend.' He had said.

At his words she ran to the bathroom to hide, with a quick stop to her fathers study on the way, which is where Alucard found her. The cut on her, although painful, was eclipsed by the ache in her heart.

Blinking back tears Little Hellsing held her head up high, she would do her father proud, she would not give their enemies cause to think her family weak. Mimicking the calm demeanor of her father, the little girl put her game face on, her stubborn chin the most pronounced amongst all her visage and walked away. But not before righting the small stand up mirror next to the basin like her father had shown.

To get a better look at his surrounding's Alucard shifted his sight to the reflections in the mirror. The glass shimmered onyx as the door to the bathroom clicked closed. Hungry eyes danced across the alabaster surfaces of tile and marble that made up the room. Everything was so sterilized, so bright, nothing like he remembered at all. In fact he could not recollect ever having seen this bathroom. As he looked around for something familiar thats when Alucard noticed on the corner of the vanity a letter opener stained with dry blood. She had cut her self... a physical reminder to never forget, replacing one kind of pain with another.

What an errant and wonderfully twisted child Alucard mussed. The room bleed black reflecting his joy at the new revelation and just as quickly flickered out.

After that Alucard made sure to drop in on the little Hellsing from time to time. She was far to interesting to risk napping for to long.

* * *

A/N: Ok so the same thing happened as last time. I meant to put more up but I can't stop writing. So because I want to get it up and away from me I had to post this part.

Tell me what you think.


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: This is the warm and fuzzy part of te story. After this it all goes down hill. Hope who ever reads this likes it.

No Harm In Watching

* * *

Six...maybe ten, Alucard couldn't decide how old the girl in the looking glass was. He noted she no longer had to stand on a stool to see into the tiny mirror her father placed on the desk. But that didn't tell him her age. For all he knew she was just a really tall five year old. Dismissing the notion as unimportant he went back to his leering. It didn't matter anyway, age did not change the fact of how delectable she looked with her nose scrunched up and brows furrowed. Disappointment was written over every inch of her person and it made him laugh to see how vain she could be.

Little Hellsing might look irked but it was a wonderful day for Alucard when she got her glasses. She pouted at the mirror, sticking her tongue out to show her displeasure, but dutifully put them on. Now Alucard could go where she went and see what she saw.- As long as it was in the confines of the estate of course. Trying to extend his reach any further could get him noticed.- He'd have to be careful though in case she caught a glimpse of hell hounds in her lenses.

"Miss Hellsing," A familiar voice called out to the both of them. They swung around, Alucard's vision of the little girl altering to a stuffy English library, and together they greeted the retainer of the Hellsing family.

Walter...Alucard knew now he hadn't slept that long if Walter was still around. Yes, these new spectacles would work out just fine for the both of them.

"The seamstress will be here in an hour." Walter said bowing slightly at the hip.

"What? Not again." Little Hellsing whined. She had spent all day couped up in the library as appointment after excruciatingly dull appointment drowned away. A hair dresser had cut her hair, new shoes were ordered, her physical done. Which in turn resulted in these ridicules glasses! Now she had to play pin cushion to that senile old bat they got to tailer her cloths.

"Why do I have to be fitted?" She pleaded. "The other girls go with their moms into town..."

"Sweetheart..." A firm voice spoke to her back.

Ashamed Little Hellsing turned to face her father. She might not like the days events but she hated even more to upset him. She had forgotten her manners and mentioned her mother. As an unwritten rule the two never spoke of her and here she was selfishly throwing her in his face.

When Arthur saw his daughters lower lip jut out he immediately forgave her mistake. Crossed arms fell slack, back to his side and his eyes softened. Alucard had never seen his former master cave in so fast or look so...paternal.

Arthur swept his daughter into his arms and placed her on his hip.

"You know I'm busy." Playfully tweaking her nose he spun her around a quick turn and put her down.

Chastised she scuffed the floor with her shoe and sheepishly looked down.

"I know... It's just, you sleep most of the day and your gone at night. You've even taken to cutting our lessons short. I'm bored and I miss doing things with you."

A heavy sigh escaped him and he closed his eyes. Of course she wanted to spend more time with him, she was only a child after all. But with his illness and the new threat terrorizing London his time was monopolized. Placing a hand on his daughters head he soothed her brow with his thumb. She was a good child, as a commander he couldn't ask for a better replacement, as a father she was the most precious gift he could ask for, yet as much as he loved her the country came first.

"My darling, I promise when things settle down and I'm feeling better you and me will take a trip anywhere you want." Arthur smiled down at his daughter to reassure her, but Alucard knew better. Arthur had worn the same smile the day he locked him in the dungeon; that smile meant he was lying.

"I'm sorry." She slipped her tiny hand between his gloved one and gave it a firm squeeze.

"Run along, but be back by three. The seamstress dislikes having to wait." He patted her on the back and shewed her to the door.

"Sir is that the best idea?" Walter was late to voice his objection.

Quickly before they could change their minds and make her stay she bolted for the exit. Looking back she smiled at her father and Walter, then disappeared behind the closed door.

Both men felt a sudden stab in their gut when she turned around, but neither voiced their concern. As she left they saw a red tint reflecting off the lenses that had not been there earlier. Surely a mere trick of the light, the alarms would have sounded; each rationalized to calm their senses but the feeling stayed.

* * *

Running down the hall Alucard saw a blur of images. Paintings of former residents, bust of long dead kings, locked door's with all sorts of goodies inside. What a joyous way to see the world, the girl taking turns he did not remember, weaving her way further into the original part of the estate.

What luck Alucard had today, he couldn't believe his former comrades where still alive. He had suspected them dead, all the mistakes in their lives catching up to them. Yet here they were, alive and responsible for the child that was bring mirth to his subjugated days. He should have known, no one but those two could have raised the girl.

Walter was aging nicely he observed. The gray strands suited him, he finally looked the way he always acted. Unfortunately the same could not be said for Arthur. Alucard's former master was looking the worse for ware. His complexion was languid and he had a worn haggard appearance to him. Normally his suits were tailored but Alucard had noticed them hanging off his frame. Something was amiss, this was not the same master who had commanded him and locked him away. This Arthur Alucard had never seen before...

Plus, they were much taller than he remembered, then of course he was seeing them from her eyes.

Before he could continue with his current train of thought Alucard abruptly skidded to a halt out side an ordinary oak door at the end of the hall. Now this room he remembered.

Years ago an associate of her fathers told her large gala's use to be thrown at the Hellsing manor. Nobility came from all over and that her grandfather had thrown wonderful parties. At the time she had laughed. In her short life she couldn't remember even a small dinner gathering being thrown. However during one of her expeditions to the old wings she had stumbled upon this secret.

After checking to make sure no one was around Hellsing's daughter stepped onto a polished marble floor. A ballroom, just like in stories only better because it is hers.

The walls are painted a deep cobalt blue ensconced by gilded molding to create panels on the wall. In each panel hung an identical mirror twice the size of a man. There are more mirrors in this one room than in the entire house, the surface laced with them creating a kaleidoscope impression. Even the door when shut is lost in the elaborate adornments. Above her is an ornate ceiling mimicking the outside of a Fabergé egg and to crown it off in the center a gothic chandelier. Carved from wood to resemble an upside down Westminster Abby, with the Hellsing crest painted around a hoop base that once housed candles.

"Magnificent," she breathed.

Although no one had used the ballroom in years it was relatively clean with a musky scent as a result of not being aired out for almost a decade. Iridescent yellow light came from frosted windows hidden in the ceilings design. The effect lent the room an ethereal quality haloing the young girl. Cob webs formed in the corners of the room and the floor was starting to loose it's shine. The mirrors where beginning to haze with a golden smog. Such a beautiful room, once cherished, now decaying from lack of love.

This had once been a joyous house... The girl looked longingly upon her surroundings. Now the inhabitants had no use for frivolous activities. Or at least that's what Arthur had told her when she had asked him one day about the room.

Not one to normally indulge in fantasy her self, Little Hellsing could not help but be swept away by the drama of it all. No amount of training changed the fact she was a little girl, and no matter how hardened every little girl if only for a second wished to be the princess at a ball.

Alucard watched as the little Hellsing resonated on every surface. In each mirror a thousand more stood in line. She looked so happy like the child that she was.

Bright azure eye's shone with impish glee. She could pretend for a moment...

All around the copies of herself became party goers and the reflection in front of her she imagined to be a knight...just like her dad. She filled the ballroom with figments and phantoms of her own creation. Her frumpy skirt and blouse now a gown fit for a queen.

"Shall we dance?" Little Hellsing pulled the folds of her pleated skirt and dipped low in a practiced curtsy. Behind her though one reflection faced her back and bowed.

Of course, rang Alucard's silent reply.

Stale air moved to a melody long dead within the grand hall. First she swayed her arms gently from side to side; the music in her head soft and distant. Following the arms her hips came next. Back and forth like a pendulum keeping time... Straining her ears to listen Hellsing picked up on the beat, a waltz...beautifully seductive. She had seen moving pictures of elegantly clad ladies being swept across the floor by their partners once; It would be nice to one day be like those women. She swore she heard the stings hum by her side.-That was silly of course, the music was all in her mind- Rocking to the lull of forgotten symphonies she waited for the crescendo. As a wave over takes the beach it swelled and washed over her forcing her to take a step.

One two three.

One two three.

She kept time in her head. Dipping and swaying she danced around the room, the score of reflections following her lead. Except for one who countered her movements. Alucard pretended to guide her across the floor. He let the song buried deep in his subconsciouses rise to the surface. Once he had danced to this song with another...It seemed only appropriate to dance to it now with Hellsing's daughter.

The forte rang and the girl child reached her arms to the sky. Around and around she spun eye's closed, whipping her skirts in a frenzy; like a whirling dervish, pounding the ground stomping out a rhythm for her own. Alucard stopped his dance to watch her. The smile that lit her face was a joy the melancholy home had not seen in years.

In years to come Alucard would remember this moment when his master looked solemn or bitter. He'd recall her smile, her freedom in the dance and would vow to see it returned one day.

Until then he relished in the chimes of her mirth. Pure, crystalline laughter unmarred by the poison of mankind. She laughed so hard Little Hellsing doubled over clutching her lower abdomen. Rolling on to her side the fit continued until she thought she'd turn blue.

How silly of her to pretend she'd ever dance at a ball like that. As a Hellsing she had more important work to do than flit around, still it had been nice... She began to take deep breaths gulping greedily for air.

Yes this had been a fun place once, the ballroom was living proof, now a tomb like the rest of her house. Getting to her knees she stood up and brushed the dirt from her skirt. The seamstress would be coming.

Sighing she resigned herself to her fate.

Glacially she let her hand skip across the mirrors, while she looked for the door. In mid step Helling stopped, taking two steps back she slowly faced her reflection. It tilted it's head when she did. Stuck out the same tongue. The doppelgangar moved like her, looked like her, but it wasn't her. Out of the sea that made up her reflection this one had red eyes. She had caught the anomaly while passing by. Hellsing waved her hand, not sure what to make of the trick, then placed it firmly on the placid surface. She leaned in further her warm breath fogging up the glass. The facsimile in the mirror smiled and blew her a kiss.

Yelping, Little Hellsing stumbled back tripping over her legs. She fell to the floor with a crash, her rear the cushion to her fall. She shook her head and wildly looked for the other her with red eyes but all she saw was the shimmer of blue. At her side she heard the door creak open. Scrambling to her feet she bolted for the hall.

Silently the door closed. In the darkened dance hall the chandelier burned crimson and out stepped Alucard still behind the looking glass. His body shook with laughter. It had been a risk but well worth it.

Yes definitely ten...or six.


	4. Chapter 4

No Harm In Watching

**Rated: M – Just in Case, for adult situations and underage Integra's. **

A/N: I felt like I had to warn this chapter is were the story get's it's M rating. I like this chapter but it's the darkest chapter I have in this story.You'll either like it or comeafter me with pitch forks, either way please let me know.

* * *

The night of his release Alucard took to wandering the halls of the Hellsing estate. With child like curiosity he made it a point to peek into every room, to learn it's secrets and play with the gadgets who's names he did not know yet. It was fascinating how things had changed. Humans always seemed to advance so rapidly... he guessed they had to too keep up with their short lives. Like a man starved he touched and explored every surface until his finger caught against a musty green curtain. With a flick of his wrist it billowed and settled back in place. 

"Apparently their taste hasn't grown. "

Looking around he made a mental note of things to be done. After twenty years he'd have to become reacquainted with the grounds. New wings had been added, security points altered, soldiers replaced, the ugly brown floor runner he remembered in the main foyer had been swapped with a decadent Persian rug. How much more had changed? As a servant to the family it was his duty to know every inch of this place, every face...

_Sigh_

That didn't make the chore anymore fun.

Alucard drummed his fingers against the second floor banister. The full moon was up and he was restless for a fight. The altercation in the dungeon had been a farce, laughable at best. Their blood foul even to his parched lips. -Not to say he hadn't ravenously drank it down- Filthy, worthless, cunts, the lot of them, hardly worth the effort. Mere peons compared to the girl. Now her blood... that had been heady and lush like a fine brandy wine. A most pleasurable way to wake up.

Integra...he finally had a name to place with the face. After all those years watching her but never hearing a name she had given it to him so freely. How wonderful it was it finally smell her, touch her, she was more real to him now then when he had first found her in his dreams. With his telepathic abilities bound and exposed glass surfaces practically banned in the estate it was a wonder he had found her at all. In fact it would not surprise him if Arthur and Walter had been trying to keep him from her the whole time. To bad they had failed! A canine peeked from his parting sneer. She was shorter than Alucard thought she'd be. Fair shot though even if she had been a hair off.

What a wonderful master she'd make. Already so strong...Integra was the only good thing to come out of that pit he had called a resting place. -Alucard couldn't count himself of course since he did not consider himself all that good.-

Now that he thought of her, the vampire realized he hadn't seen his new miniature master since after calling Walter.

Scratching his head he looked around as if expecting her to pop up behind him. There was only one room he had not searched yet, he had been saving it for last. Arthur's.

"Where has the little Hellsing snuck off too?" he chuckled wolfishly to the night air.

* * *

Below her Integra's enemies laid, defeated, but the quiet of their tomb could not compare to the silence up stairs. Her silence was born of hardship and a broken heart. 

As he suspected Alucard found his missing little girl barricaded in her fathers rooms. Integra had chosen Arthur's study located next to his bed chamber to await the arrival of Walter. For her it was where she felt most safe. In this room her father would sit her down and teach her about the occult. Over by the desk was were he taught her how to clean her first gun, and where they had tea in the afternoons. As long as she was here nothing could harm her. She rubbed the back of her hand under a dry eye to wipe away non existent tears.

The back of the chair was at an angle facing away from him but he could still see her in the tinted reflection of the window. A phantasm floating in the night. Looking closely Alucard could see just how young she was huddled in her fathers chair, an old worn blanket stretched tightly over her shoulders to shield her from the monsters in the night.

Taking his time to reach her Alucard strolled around the room. The study at least Arthur had kept the same.

Long awkward legs were tucked tight against her chest, hugging them like long lost friends. Integra's head rested in the corner of the over stuffed leather chair; vacant eye's reminiscent of a finely crafted porcelain doll looked out across the room and through the only window. The events of the last three days swirled in the new directors mind as she tried to process the information methodically breaking things down into charts and list. One list she could not get rid of. Over and over she ticked off her losses. She had lost a father, hadn't been bureau chief for more than three hours before a coup had formed, her uncle was dead who's death she was responsible for, was shot in the arm and was now in possession of a creature she had been sworn to eradicate. Integra's only asset, she was lucky she hadn't found time to eat yet for she was sure her stomach would retch.

Now she had to add a new loss to her list. It seemed whatever peace she sought was to be interrupted by him...The curtains draping the window ruffled bringing a chilled breeze to run over her hot face. Integra did not need to turn around to know a second person had entered the study. Who was in fact right behind her despite not being reflected in the window her imaging was currently occupying.

Odd, she wondered if all creatures from hell brought a chill in the air. You'd think with the accepted dogma of hell being a fiery pit of torments beings from that dimension would warm a place up. Maybe she should do some research... Anything to forget her losses.

Alucard just waited, knowing his tiny master was ignoring him, but he had eternity on his side so his patience was more infinite than hers and soon rewarded. When she realized he would not go she broke the silence with the first thing she could think of.

"I killed him."

"I know, it was quite...enjoyable." It made his dark heart skip to picture her, another piece of innocence lost with the click of a gun. He wondered how much more she could loose, how much more she had to loose. "Does it bother you?"

"He was a monster..."

"But?"

Slowly she turned her head looking up, devoid eyes registering nothing as Integra looked over her shoulder in his direction. She opened her mouth to speak but the words failed to come out. How could she tell this stranger what was gripping at her heart? Her uncle was a monster...yet what was she? She blinked and the tall lithe form of her new servant came into focus. His head was cocked in an omnipotent arrogant gesture, waned skin stretched at the corners of his mouth in a malevolent smile. He still wore the tattered straight jacket stained black from years of sot and a day of carnage. Inwardly Integra laughed at the worlds cruel joke. To take away everything she loved, show her the true nature of man, turn her world upside down and leave her with this! An abomination, yet this creature was all she had left now. Her only tie to a family on the brink of extinction.

Suddenly it became very cold and lonely in her corner of the room when it finally hit her, she was the last Hellsing. They had lived so long disconnected from the outside world, hiding in the shadows they fought. All for the sake of duty and country. For what? Who'd remember those that came before her once she was dead? Who'd remember her? It was disheartening to realize the work of her family would be forgotten.

Gazing back up she saw her fathers legacy and it was if a knife twisted in her gut. No human would remember her family...But he might remember them if only for a short time. Fates cruel joke number two. It looked like she was stuck with him for the time being. However she still couldn't voice the truth, instead she settled for the half truth.

"Father forgot to warn me the worst monsters are human."

"I'm sure he would have gotten to that lesson if he had lived long enough."

"Yes...It's a shame I'll have to continue my studies with out him." She spoke with all the conviction and emotion of a stone wall.

_This will not do, not at all._ Alucard shook his head reproachfully, he knew the little Hellsing was a strong person, she had proved that today with her show of pride and gusto. Yet sometime between now and when he had left Integra had created a fortress of ice to encase her spirit, even blocking his attempts to read her mind. Like any human child she should be hurting from the loss of her father, enraged and torn apart by the betrayal of her uncle.

She should be crying, he thought, instead nothing showed. Not even a trickle of sorrow.

Crossing the distance between them in three long strides Alucard scoped his master up in a flurry of blankets and platinum hair. She whimpered, more from pain in her right shoulder than from surprise but held rigidly still. This was a very demeaning position for her to be in she noted. Her damnable servant was holding her like a newborn baby, solid arms positioned at her back and under her knees. Integra's eyes grew wide however when she felt his hand snake up her thigh heading toward her rear.

Alucard knew it was coming, long before he saw the flash of gold, or felt the flutter in her pulse, the vampire had sensed the strain in her muscles that suggested she was going to attack. It seemed Integra was worried for her safety, which she had every reason to be, and found a weapon before he had searched her out. Being a vampire he could have stopped her but there was no point. Not like she could kill him with a letter opener. Alucard was disappointed though when he didn't feel cold metal tear through his flesh. Looking down he saw the small child cradled in his arms a look of shock and fear. A hair away from his throat the tiny letter opener that belonged to her father.

_No good, he thought, if she hesitates._

Taking a deep breath he released a disappointed sigh then brought his forehead to meet hers. His hair cascaded down in a shimmering white veil giving privacy to their conversation. Integra felt the hot air from his mouth hit her across the face. Her nostrils filled with the offensive stench of his breath, the sweet rotting offal of decay. It was the smell of her uncle and those men, dead, nourishment for the beast.

"Now what on earth did you intend to do with that?" He chided her.

"I...I was giving you a chance."

At that statement Alucard threw his head back and let out a hearty hair raising laugh.

"A chance? To what, eat you?"

Integra narrowed her eyes at his statement. The foul brute was laughing at her! Yes she knew it had been foolish to think she could hurt him with a meager office supply ...but the cad did not have to rub it in. It was all she had. Fuming she turned her head so she would not have to see his mocking face.

"What's so wrong with allowing your enemy to surrender?" She asked haughtily under her breath as her lips thinned into a scowl. It was the first spark he had seen all night but it swiftly died. Hesitantly she dropped her arm so it was no longer at his throat but still between them.

A gentle touch that sent butterflies fluttering to her chest caused Integra to gulp. She felt the cool silken caress of a gloved finger against her cheek guiding her back to confront him. If possible when she looked up Alucard was closer, whirling scarlet eye's fixed on her form. It made her dizzy watching his eyes shift like that, but she refused to look away again. After what seemed like a life time staring him down he finally spoke, his voice a husky whisper in her ear.

"You'll learn," he chuckled amused by her naivety.

Carelessly Alucard spun around and plopped in the chair. Crossing one ankle over his knee he gently set the girl down and nestled her to his chest. The sudden intimate contact caused Integra to jerk and the letter opener dug into his shoulder. If Alucard noticed he didn't appear to care. Hesitantly Integra turned around to face him, placing her knee's on either side of his hips. She was to young to realize it but she had just put her self in a compromising position, however the demon was more than aware for the both of them. The snug seating arrangements of his new companion caused the vampire to smile wider and wrap his lanky arms around her petite waist. Little Hellsing looked so frail tangled against his corpse...He almost felt ashamed for attempting what he was about to do. God knows they'd kill him if he ever tried something like this again. Yet this was the last time the two would probably be alone like this and Alucard decided to make the best of their situation.

Letting his hand drift up to her line of sight he waited until she caught his movement and his master panicked. Integra's body wrenched, immediately embedding the dagger further into his shoulder as she pushed away. The girl never lost eye contact though, even as the rest of her body tried to flee in terror, she met him face on. However she was trapped and Alucard had no intention of letting her go.

A lovely game of cat and mouse, much more pleasant to play than their earlier one below.

Patiently Alucard waited for her to stop struggling then placed a cool palm on her heated cheek. Tenderly he brushed a strand of hair that had fallen in her face and tucked it behind her ear. His fingers lingered at the spot and casually began to twine themselves between her locks.

Why? She pleaded with her eye's. Why was he doing this to her?

Immediately Integra felt the acidic juices creep up her esophagus. Her lower lip trembled with rage but her throat locked in fear. At the moment she was spent and did not have the strength nor will to order her monster around. Disgusted with her cowardice and appalled by his behavior she couldn't bare to look at him any longer. His sadistic smile, eye's burning with the flames of hell mingled with the way she felt safe was too much. Integra had had enough for the day, had nothing left to give, if he didn't stop she'd burst.

Little did she know that was Alucard's plan. He knew she hadn't cried once since her father died. Sure a stray tear here or there, but not the mourning she deserved. Since Alucard was the only servant currently at the estate it was his responsibility to comfort the girl. Unfortunately he was a monster and as such knew little in the way of kind gestures. So he'd comfort her in the only way he knew how. With gestures used to lull the spirit and stir the fires of passion. Integra had to feel again and this was the only way he knew how.

Alucard tried to make his smile seem more warm...more loving. Instead it gave the impression of more depraved desires. Integra squeaked and closed her eyes tight.

_This is to much, this is all to much. _

Everything swirled around her head all jumbled and mixed up. The pungent smell of old leather and blood wafted to her nose, was it his? It was pleasant and familiar like her fathers smoking tobacco or Walters earl grey tea. Then there was his hands...they encompassed her, grabbed her, grazed every inch of her with out ever moving. Gods his filthy hands weren't just on her, she felt their piercing touch inside her, burning her from the inside out. Yet why was she so content to stay? And her stupid arm wouldn't stop throbbing! Integra's breathing quickened, she felt the room shrink then expand... she was feeling faint and had to lean her forehead on his shoulder to keep from falling over.

Purring his affection Alucard held his little girl tightly letting her bury her face in the crook of his neck.

_Poor little Hellsing_, he sang mentally to sooth the torrents in her mind.

It all just hurt to much. Integra didn't know what to make of this, or of him. He was not being kind for kindness sake, she did not believe he held that much benevolence. The creature was toying with her...but to what end? Oh and the way he touched her was not the warm fatherly embrace she remembered. -Although she felt just as safe. Which was also a troubling thought to the young girl.-This was something else, something she had yet to experience and it scared her because it only reminded her how completely lost in the world she was. If she screamed who would hear her? If she died who would mourn her?

One strong hand held her firmly at the base of her neck. The tip of the monsters nail lightly scratched the contours of her jaw then made it's way down to caress the jugular. Beneath the tips of Alucard's fingers her heart beat played. Not a rhythmic symphony but the thunder of war drums. He almost had her. Now he had to push her over the edge.

Slipping his hand to her back he trailed his claws between her shoulder blades in a circular motion before gliding splayed fingers against her rib cage.

He felt the flutter of her lashes against his neck as a small gasp escaped to warm his frigid skin. Alucard smirked showing all four fangs. This was enjoyable because for the first time, the only time, he'd be in control of a Hellsing he chuckled.

_I truly belong in hell._

Integra's breath hitched and she twisted the knife in his shoulder. Continuing his menstruations Alucard brought a gentle hand to lay upon her heart; fingers ghosting across the edge of her developing breast.

Never letting go of her paltry weapon Integra clung to her tormentor, nuzzling further into the base of his throat. She shook her head from side to side, silently screaming no and Alucard felt it come, a crack in the ice. Her anguish was deafening in his mind as it pounded against the barrier she had erected. Then nothing. As fast as it came the current stopped. A wave of calm washed over her and she relaxed. With one shuddering breath she began to wail.

"I'm only a kid!"

One tiny fist pounded against his chest.

"I hate him for leaving me," she hissed into his ear. Her words were seething with spite, enough to cause even the impassive Alucard to shudder.

"And I hate him even more for leaving me with you!" At her last statement Integra ripped the little letter opener from where it was now firmly embedded then brought it down where his heart should have been. But of course he had no heart.

The queasy smile faded from his lips and Alucard's eyes looked with longing and sadness upon Integra. His dear, sweet little girl, a vision in red; Her face a bloody mess where she had smeared the blood from his shoulder, mingled with the flecks of the new wound she had made. Integra would be a great master to him he thought as she glared at him with wide azure eyes. Cocking his head and smirking he wiped a bead of blood from her chin.

That was all it took; finally she cried. Integra cried for her father whom she loved above all else. For her uncle who had let the darkness consume him. Most of all she cried for her self.

She nearly strangled him while enveloping thin arms around Alucard's throat and buried her face in his hair. Her tears and sobs were monstrous wracking her body in uncontrollable tremors and shakes. He was sure he had heard her blow her nose... but he didn't mind, who knew when she'd be free to cry like this again. Alucard returned their awkward hug, to his surprise stroking her long corn silk hair with more caring and ease than he knew he could posses.

Integra would feel like a fool in the morning, letting her servant see her cry like this, letting him hold her in such a familiar way, but tonight it was alright. Here at this time, in his arms Integra was protected and her tears started anew.

Finally able to mourn in the cold embrace of the damned.

* * *

A/N: This chapter was the real reason why I rated this M. 


	5. Chapter 5

No Harm In Watching

Rated: M – Just in Case, for adult situations and underage Integra's.

A/N:

This chapter was inspired by a painting posted on deviant art. If you want to know the link let me know and I'll send it to you

* * *

"Bloody Hell..." Integra took a shaky step on to the cold asphalt road while holding a throbbing head in her hand. She was a mess, banged up and bruised in places she never knew existed. If at all possible she swore her hair hurt. However as haggard as she was, it did not compare to the carnage behind her. At her back was the twisted remains of what had recently been her car. A ruined birthday present...

Integra was now fifteen years old, the unofficial head of the Hellsing organization. -The title would not official go to her until her eighteenth birthday...if she lived that long.- Today was scheduled to be another routine day, wake up, sign a few documents, off to school then back home. Johnson had been her driver this evening... A nice enough fellow, although he talked too much, wanting to know how her day went.

Giving her head a quick nod to rid itself of useless contemplation Integra tried to focus. She had just stepped out of a mangled car! Johnson should be the last thing on her mind. She turned around to asses the damage however her brain was slow to grasp what she was seeing. At first she could not tell if the cars weird parking job was a result of the blow to her head but on further inspection she determined she had seen it right. The car was flipped upside down, roof pulled back like a can of sardines and her driver presumed dead.

"Bloody fucking hell!"

The world spun just then and Integra lost her footing. Faltering she stumbled until a frigid stone surface was propping her up.

"A wall?..." What was a wall doing in the middle of a road? Dazed she looked around trying to find something familiar. Instead she found red bricks stretched parallel in either direction, a ladder hanging a few feet above. There was no sign of another human, only the buzz of florescent lanterns. Integra realized she wasn't on the road at all but some back ally; the car blocking the entrance. How the hell did they get here?

Like the flash of a bulb before a picture is taken a memory surfaced. An explosion...there had been an explosion. The car in front...her men yelling at her to get down, shielding her. Frantically she looked around remembering an important piece of information. Where were her men?

* * *

Alucard watched from a distance as his adolescent master struggled to stay standing. She looked horrid from his vantage point. Glass clung to her hair and heavy green coat giving her an unnatural glow under the street lamps. Beads of blood clung to her cheek while her school uniform was torn revealing legs bruised and scrapped. It had been a miracle she survived, the car must have been part tank. The others with her might have lived also if those things had not been waiting for them...

Upon his arrival Alucard had seen a straggler freak wander into the dark, the body of a man much to large for a normal person to carry slung over their shoulder. To bad this wasn't his mission, Alucard sulked crossing his arms in defiance. Maybe then he would have saved them.

In fact Alucard wouldn't have even been there at all if it hadn't been for her screaming his name. Integra was probably not even aware she had done such a thing. After the murder of her uncle the child had sworn to never need him again and up until this point she had been true to her word. He had even contemplated not coming but something in her plea told him he was required.

Waiting for a more opportune time Alucard regarded Integra leaning against the wall with her forehead obviously having trouble staying conscious. It would serve her right to just leave her there however he knew what was coming. No matter how upset he was at being told to stay home he wasn't mad enough to leave his master in the hands of these foul lowlifes.

So Alucard reluctantly gave in to the urge to aid her, leaving his post lurking from the shadows and slowly made his way to the girl.

* * *

"Nice night..." Two disembodied burning eye's materialized in the dark.

"Quite fiend..." Integra meant to sound authoritative but her words sounded more groggy than she would have liked. To make matters worse she hadn't the strength to lift her head in defiance.

Opting for an alternative position to make her point Integra got to one knee and pulled the Browning she kept hidden from her back. From this vantage point on the ground she could see her vampire more clearly. He had emerged from the shadows, shrouded in his latest choice of wardrobe, crimson red. She scoffed, a few months ago he would wear nothing but blue. Vain little... Integra shook her head. She had to stay focused.

"Alucard...Why are there three of you?" She asked, aiming at all three heads. She'd shoot them all just to stop them spinning.

With an amused expression he stepped closer mocking a gentlemanly bow. His jacket billowed behind him as his arm swept between them, offering her his hand. At the gesture Integra flinched but held firm. She didn't move, keeping the barrel lined with the middle head.

Shrugging off his masters rejection Alucard plucked her glasses from her nose and flipped them around. Holding them up to his eyes for her inspection Integra was able to see the damage. Etched into the glass were cracks causing the images to multiply when looked through.

For a second the solemn child smiled, now instead of multiple vampires she had one blurry one. Somehow the blow to her head made the joke funnier than it really was.

"How did? What are... you doing here?" Integra grumbled at her inability to form sentences. "I ordered you to stay at the compound."

"I thought you might need my help."

"Don't assume to know my thoughts!" She swayed under the force of her own words but righted herself before falling. "Stay out of this."

Of course he knew her thoughts! It was the whole reason he was there.

Sighing Alucard took a step back in retreat, extending his form to it's full length. Placing the broken spectacles on his nose he regarded the girl for a moment. A small army of warrior women staring him down with murder in their eye's. Each composed with that insufferable stubborn set to her jaw. There was no arguing with these woman he decided. Alucard was glad this was all an illusion of glass because he did not think he could handle that many masters with her pleasant qualities.

"As you wish but you may want to rethink that order when you see what's coming." In an elaborate flourish of his coat he side stepped to allow Integra to see what was in front of her.

"Wha?" She used the wall to crawl to her feet and squinted into the dark.

Sluggishly a black barrier was heading for her direction. Who ever was out to kill her tonight sure was being cliché. I mean really a moving wall? A muddled Integra thought. What next spikes? Then she heard it; The moans and hollow cries of ghouls. Of course it wasn't a damn wall she berated herself.

"Bastards..."

Integra had found her men.

Johnson her driver...

Gabriel the captain of the squad escorting her...

Marrler the soldier who had pushed her out of harms way.

All and all ten ex-hellsing operatives; their bodies defiled.

"Come Integra, what will you do now?" Alucard was standing off to her side now, his voice a little too joyous for her liking. "Aren't you going to shoot?"

He leaned up against the ruined car, arms crossed with a devilish smirk on his face. It was time to see what his master was made off.

"I – I"

"Their just ghouls."

"They were my men..."

"Key word 'Were', your men are dead."

It was hard to admit but the jerk was right...These were monsters, and she killed monsters. Slowly she raised her gun and aimed at the first ghoul that came into focus. Johnson...

Watching in anticipation Alucard's wolfish grin grew more sinister. It filled his evil heart with glee to know in a few moments mayhem would ensue. All that was left for the girl to do was pull the trigger, but she hesitated. If she was trying to make him nervous Little Hellsing was seceding. In a situation where every second counts she was wasting what precious few she had. To make matters worse with every second the ghastly horde neared her Alucard felt his minimal patience being chipping away. Until finally he determined it was up to him to get the carnage going.

Like a summer breeze he drifted behind her the air shifting between them. Gingerly he placed his hand at her waist while sliding the other down her neck. He leaned in so their two cheeks brushed against one another and in a flirtatious tone spoke against her skin. "Say the word and I'll kill them all for you." With that he felt her trembling body tense in his arms and her spine went ridged. However the reaction he got had not been what was intended.

Brushing him off as one would a fly she disregarded his prattling opting to take control of the situation. This was still her army her reminded herself squaring her shoulders in anticipation of facing the enemy. Integra stepped away from the vampires grasp, turning around to face him. Holding herself with pride and quite dignity she stared him down hoping the fury at his offer mirrored in her glare. Taking a deep breath she readied herself as if about to yell. Then like lightning she bolted for the exit. Puzzled Alucard merely shrugged, he really hadn't seen that coming.

So Integra ran, passed her ruined car, out onto the dead street, anywhere her dizzied mind would let her go. All the while being chased by the nauseas cries of her men. A tear slipped down her cheek. She wasn't ready to face them...any of them. How could Alucard be so cruel! These were her men, she didn't want them to die...but they had died a more rational side told her. Still, how could she be the one to kill them again? It wasn't suppose to be like this...

Alucard, casually strolling down the avenue, took the time to be impressed by his masters speed. He was sure she had a few broken bones and at least a sprained ankle as a result of the crash yet here she was giving these creatures a run for their money. Contusion and all. Why Little Hellsing insisted on holding on to such sentiments was beyond him though. She was acting like she had never shot a person before, he scoffed. This was the same child who did not blink shooting her worthless uncle and he was still alive! Killing the dead should have been easy.

Exasperated by the situation he continued to saunter down the road after the retreating form of the young girl.

* * *

Letting out a groan of dismay Integra's shoulders sank. Somehow she had let her addled mind lead her to a dead end. Before her blocking her route was a pair of solid oak doors, behind her a flight of stairs crowded by the undead. When she looked up, out of breath, on her last legs and mentally beaten she nearly choked on the laughter she tried to suppress.

"A fucking Catholic church."

She threw her head back in defeat letting her eyes wander over the night sky. Above her the stars twinkled with sterling brilliance, the moon rising with a lovely tint of red...not a living person on what should have been a busy street to mar the scene. It really was a nice night...to be assassinated she bitterly thought.

Unimpressed she turned around to face her execution squad. At her feet the mindless fiends climbed over one another to get to her; fighting amongst themselves to see who would have the first bite. In the middle of the ruckus Alucard stood smiling a ghoul being held by its skull in his terrifying hand.

With all the carnage before her Integra chose to calmly focus on him.

"One order and I will get rid of these vermin for you." His voice was soothing as he took a step closer.

The faintest twitch of a smile tugged at her lips as she cocked her head pretending not to comprehend what he was asking of her while she gave him a puzzled look. A withered hand tore at her skirt, forcing Alucard to watch in disgust while beasts moved towards his master. With out her consent he was helpless to aid her and it seemed she was not inclined to give it.

How could she just stand there giving up? Had he been wrong about her? Was she weak like all the rest? One word, something, a damn nod of the head would do! Alucard's temper was starting to flare, he could not remember the last time he had felt such contempt. Through gritted teeth he gave her one last chance."Say it...Say it Integra!" The creature hysterically cried.

Suddenly the world seemed less muddled. Integra's surroundings became more clear, her vision less blurry. She quirked an uneasy smile, giving off an air of insanity, while taking the safety off her gun. A rumble in the night sky echoed in the church as the child placed a bullet in the skull of the former man Alucard held.

Johnson...

"Go to hell," she spat in outrage at her servant.

This was not how it was suppose to be...As a young girl Integra's father had always told her stories of the glory of Hellsing. Stories about honor, dignity and pride. Here she was at the center of it all, watching her childhood tales pale in the presence of reality. Where was the glory for her men? To have their souls violated, condemned, mutated beyond recognition. This was not how the stories went...and yet this was how it had to be. Dead or alive, these were her men and hers command. It was her duty to send them into the throws of battle, it was theirs to die if need be and if the world saw fit to send them back as monsters it was her honor as their commander to help them find peace. Giving up and leaving them to Alucard would demean their sacrifice. So one by one she shot them, in the head or in the heart, stopping only once to change magazines, until she killed them all; leaving nothing for her vampire.

Alucard frowned at the little girl haloed in neon light from a tacky cross slung above the door, wearing a smug look of satisfaction. Pouting he crossed his arms disapprovingly, he had hoped to kill something tonight.

However her small victory did not last long, the smile soon faded as she began to wobble on shaky legs. He watched from the bottom of the steps as her eyes rolled to the back of her head and she fell amongst a pile of corpses. Kicking a path through the dead Alucard came up beside her and scooped her in his arms. Holding her against him like a cherished doll he began to walk her home.

* * *

On the road to the Hellsing estate he studied the gangling form nestled in his arms. She did not fit as well as she had those years before. Her legs dangled to far over his one arm while her head rolled against his shoulder. Even knocked out she seemed tense and ill at ease. Her features sharper in rest instead of softening like most mortals asleep. Today had been a challenge for her... Although worried for a moment she would fail, like the master Alucard knew her to be she had far exceeded his expectations. It was too bad she was flawed, to much humanity clouded her better judgment. The fool lived and died with every man she sent into battle. Such compassion would eat her alive. Just like another woman he had known a lifetime ago...

Without realizing he asked, "Why not just send me? Let me fight." His voice was calm. Any anger present during the course of the night gone.

"Because I will not be accused of using you as a crutch." She rolled in his arms until her head was flush against his chest, one hand clutching a button of his shirt."We have fought the creature's from hell long before you ever joined the organization and will continue to do so long after I'm dead. Besides I'd hate to inconvenience you."

"Bold words from someone who just ran." He laughed with out a trace of malice. "Pretty speeches don't impress me."

Like the child she was Integra stuck out her tongue then leaned further into him to show she wasn't mad.

"Your bleeding..." He stated in a whisper more to himself.

A gloved hand extended to her neck. Below the arterial artery a small trickle of blood wound its way down. He wasn't going to bite he told himself... Leaning closer Alucard took in the exquisite sent that wafted to his nose. A mixture of iron and rose...maybe taste. The vampires mouth salivated, extending a long tongue past thirsty lips. He was just a breath way when he heard the familiar cocking of a hammer; the barrel of Integra's gun placed against his temple.

"It makes my loins ache to see you like this." Alucard sighed into her neck. Integra felt his lashes flutter against her cheek as he slowly brought his head up. Garnet met azure and while watching the flames of his hell eyes dance Integra felt pity stir in her emotions. Strange how up until that point all she had felt was an icy hatred. However she had heard the longing in his voice and saw the need in his eyes. Past the arrogant facade, the devilish smile, all those nasty taunts...Dare she say it? Think it? The creature was lonely, even a little sad. Immediately all her past animosity towards the monster washed away. She finally understood what her father meant about children crying for death. No matter how long Alucard lived he was like a child and she had hurt his feelings. By keeping him away, refusing to let him do his job she – a mere teenager – injured a monsters pride. It was like being picked last for a game of football or told you were to young to set the table. Alucard had wanted her to notice him, lashing out, trying to hurt her was the only way he knew to get attention.

As soon as Integra made the connection between his actions and hers Alucard looked away. If he read her mind he did not show it.

"Tell me Integra when will you find the courage to finally pull the trigger?"

Ignoring his earlier crude comment she merely tucked her gun away in her coat pocket. She'd let him have this one, just this once. Even throw him a bonus.

"Find them." He looked back confused about the them she was referring too. "Find those that did this to us and kill them."

"It would be an honor, my dear sweet master." His wicked grin widened and Integra saw the fire's in his eyes rise.


	6. Chapter 6: Ending Part 1

Lately I have been telling people that the next chapter would be the last...I lied, sorry. It worked better broken up into 2 parts. So here is the first.

Thank you to all who reviewed.

* * *

**No Harm In Watching : Ending Part 1**

Hundreds of them stared back at her. Listless cruel creatures; eyes heavy with guilt, an ashen color grazing their cheeks, lips waned thin with crushing dread. All fragments of herself. Integra looked around at the millions of tiny pieces littering the floor at her feet, glinting in the dying light of dusk to echo her sorrow. Some sections of glass are big enough to reflect her person in whole, others cut off body parts, mutilating her form. One shard took a chunk from her stomach, another hacked off her arm. In one fragment her head was sawed in half at an angle so she had only one good eye to scrutinize with.

Such macabre visions of oneself should be unnerving, Integra thought miserably, but really the glass was only showing her how she felt. She could not fault the lifeless reflections.

Integra bowed her head low, covering her face with a free hand trying to hide her shame. The adolescent had let her temper get the better of her. The result of her outburst being not a single glass object in her pitiful room was left in tack. Even the unsuspecting window had not gone unscathed by her tirade. At the base a paper weight size hole let in the crisp fall night air.

There was no escaping it; Integral Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing had royally fucked up. Because of her so many had died the other night… and the children, dear god the children. She cringed inwardly at the memory. This war with the undead was becoming absurd. When had the scale of power began to tilt? Once there had been a time when the creatures of the night feared the Hellsing name. The wicked avoided these lands knowing they were protected and the few that dared venture onto these sacred shores were made to regret it. Now the low some beast were mocking her beloved organization, her family, her Queen, her! Throwing their triumph back in her face; becoming bolder, attempting grander schemes.

With a violent tug the sound of ripped cloth brought Integra back to the present. She looked at the curtain in her hand wondering when it had found its way there then decided to finish the deed. In a show of anger the rest of the curtain tore from the hooks pooling to the floor.

"You can still act like such a child Master."

"Don't bother me with your adolescent games servant."

"It seems I'm not the one playing games tonight. Tell me truthfully how much did the other night bother you? Hmmm?" Alucard's voice was smooth and placated like a mothers lullaby but his words felt like a punch to the gut.

A flare of a nostril told Alucard his jibes had seceded in fueling her temper.

An elementary school…A god damn elementary school.

Integra's open palm connected with the cool surface of glass. Hitting the window was all she could do to keep from trembling at the memory. Last night only a few of her men had died thanks in part to Alucard. Although for the new leader of the Hellsing Organization a few was still one to many. Her vampire had gone in first, taking out most of the ghouls but the trap had already been set. The children had been practicing for their school recital. What those – those freaks did went beyond monstrous. A new word would have to be made to account for their actions.

The school was engulfed in flames before any of the children could get out. Who knew how many had still been alive? She did not want to think of the alternative. How many had already been dead?

"I don't know what you're talking about." Came a composed response, one that she was even surprised to muster. Integra looked around at her destroyed room. "I felt I needed to redecorate. The room hasn't changed since I was what? 12?"

Red eyes narrowed appraising the fickle teenager in front of him; a dark cloud hung over his master tonight. If it could reveal itself physically Alucard was sure it would dwarf his own black manifestations of anger. Although I have my own reasons to be upset...he malevolently thought. Alucard crossed his arms and feigned indifference, the thought of her anger taking on a physical form amusing him as he silently wondered what shape it would take.

"Well Alucard?"

"Defiantly not a cat." He mumbled, turning a lazy eye in her direction. "Hm?"

"I said," Integra growled irritated at being ignored. "Are you done?"

"You know if you wish to not be disturbed you could just order me to leave."

"Alucard being with you is like being alone. It makes no difference." She flopped unceremoniously into a reading chair in the far corner cradling her aching head. Yes the incident at the school had been disturbing not doubt. Yet it was not like this was the first time tragedy had struck. Maybe that was part of the problem Integra pondered. It seemed that lately victory was unattainable which annoyed her to no end. Sure the demon terrorist had also perished but she didn't feel like she had won. The war still waged on.

No... the school debacle had only been the kindling to Integra's current funk. Compounding to her list of trouble and current headache was the emergency round table meeting ordered today. She ground her teeth to think of it. Part of her could not blame the counsel for demanding her resignation. This operation, lead under her command had truly been a farce. Still the audacity to suggest that they could do better was unforgivable. Left to their own devices those vultures would tear the organization apart handing out pieces like it was some fief. Soon they'd start fighting over who got the bigger slice of land.

Integra threw her head back in disgust. Who was she kidding? They already were squabbling over who got what behind her back. It wouldn't surprise her one bit to walk into the conference room and find them measuring the table. Too bad for them as long as she was alive this was still her organization, this was still her home and no one would tell her how to run it.

Yesterday had been a tragedy no doubt. She had ordered her men in, had not checked to see if anyone was still there after hours, and had not realized the trap in time. However that did not mean she'd give up. This was just a bump in the road. Far worse had and would happen in all their lives.

Easing back into the plush wingback chair Integra finally felt ready to relax until the faintest of caresses suddenly brushed across her neck. Instinctively her hand shot up to grab the offender but when she reached nothing but air grasped back. However the sensation was still there, a phantom touch against her skin. Quickly she shot out of the seat, whirling around looking for the cause but the room seemed empty. She narrowed her eyes peering into the shadows of the room. Integra knew better than to think the absence of a presence meant the absence of a threat.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" She snapped at thin air.

"Just playing a new game." Came Alucard's gruff sing song voice.

With that Integra felt the wisp of something soft and malleable against her wrist. She held it up for further inspection and swore she saw a divot where she felt the kiss.

"Stop this, this instant!" The vampire was getting on her last nerve, she was seriously contemplating locking him in his rooms for the rest of the week.

"But I'm not doing anything Master… well not exactly."

Sweeping the room for the source of phantom touches Integra finally saw it or she should say him standing behind her in the reflections of glass. Surprised she took a step back expecting to bump into him but no solid surface greeted her. Noting with dismay the images did not join her retreat Integra ran over to the window to get a better look. Before her like some Gothic painting was Alucard and herself; they stood, stoically silent as Alucard rested a hand over her pulse while the other held her arm up as he placed a well thought out kiss against her wrist. Each time Integra felt the phantom flutter and hissed.

"Since you're too busy to play I thought I'd entertain myself some other way."

"Now who's being childish?" She demanded quirking an eye brow. So he is just trying to get me mad…pay back for my earlier comments maybe. "I don't have time for this or your foolishness."

"Yet you have time to destroy your room in a tantrum."

"If I want to break my things that is my right."

"And if I just want some fun…is that not my right? I'm not doing anything…harmful."

"But these are my reflections!" Integra's normally calm voice broke into a whine.

"So what if I changed the images?" Alucard's features split into a jagged grin.

Integra was about to take a step forward determined to rip the monster from his hiding place in the shadow of the window when her path was suddenly blocked. The broken pieces from earlier began to rise as if on their own accord displaying the vision she had seen in the window. Once Integra was surrounded the shards began to dance in a circle around her. Some how locking him up became to good of a punishment for her disobedient servant. Pounding him with her own fist quickly became Integra's next option but she did not move for fear of being cut.

The pictures began to change inside the shards turning into crystal memories. Men on horseback rode across the scene clashing in the middle of a fog covered field. Other pieces held the impaled figures of the innocent, torn battle fields from an assortment of times and wars long since over. She even saw her father and Abraham fighting the No Life King...watched as each trapped him, imprisoned him.

Some shards held the figments of women with gentle rose colored blushes gracing their cheek while others had their throats ripped out. Integra did not need three guess to know by whom. She choose to ignore these figures instead focusing on what she knew to be newer memories. She saw herself how she would have appeared to the monster while in the dungeon; a tiny thing with a gun shacking in her hand. Pictures of her as a small child still in pigtails, Arthur lifting his daughter over his head, her Sunday dress billowing around her knees, flickered in and out of consciousness.

However these were not the images that interested her either. Other shards began to turn ruby red, here Alucard displayed her own nightmares. Integra on a war torn field mauled by ghouls. Her uncle Richard towering over her, his placed at the temple of her head. The other Knights surrounding her as she was led away in ropes and chains to the gallows. It was the last dream she saw though that clamped her heart. In a pool of her own blood Integra took her last shuddering breath as a maliciously happy Alucard lapped at her neck like a hungry dog.

Tearing way from the reflections Integra laid her steely gaze on Alucard still posturing in the window pane. In his arms the traitorous imitation smiled a knowing smile as if somehow the fake knew a secret Integra was unaware of.

The image reached a nimble hand behind her burying her fingers deep in Alucard's hair. He took the gesture as an opportunity to nuzzle the exposed neck. Integra had to dig her nails into her palms to stop from reaching up and brushing the itchy strands away.

No, no, no. These are not memories, Integra scolded herself for being caught up in his illusions. The vampire was toying with her obviously upset. Integra played with the idea that his more than foul behavior was due to some disdain but what did he have to be so pissed about? What could a vampire care so much about that he was willing to risk her wrath? Besides the round table meeting that day had been uneventful. Then it all clicked, his temper, the images...he had been eavesdropping and just like that Integra broke his illusion as if nothing more than a wet paper bag.

"So tell me servant…Just how upset are you over tonight?" She looked over her shoulder to where Alucard was standing in the corner a scowl gracing his features. If it was not for his bad mood he would have congratulated the young girl for breaking free but he was so instead he growled.

Without waiting for a snide remark to follow Integra quickly walked out of the room, slamming the door shut on the nightmares.


	7. Chapter 7:Ending Part 2

**Final Chapter: No Harm In Watching**

Hours ticked by and the servants on the lower floors began to worry. The chambers of their mistress had gone eerily quiet. No more arguing or sounds of glass breaking came from her rooms. One would have thought this to be a relief –surely she had calmed down- but in a household where silence was feared above all else the servants dared not disturb their female lord. It was the calm before a storm and now more than ever they feared what might happen if they ventured to the second floor. The consensus among the staff was if she was hurt and dying let Walter find her dead when he returned.

The reason for the sudden peace was much more simple than they would have believed. The silence was merely due to the fact Integra was no longer in her rooms.

Stretching her arms over her head and taking a deep breath, she relaxed in her father's favorite chair. It had been years since she entered his chambers. After that night with Alucard she just hadn't found the courage to come back in. The atmosphere had changed; the room never felt the same. Walter had even tried convincing her to move into the master suite but somehow it had seemed wrong; almost sacrilegious. To her these where still her father's rooms.

Tonight though she could over look the unease she felt entering the foreign chambers because after the events with the counsel she needed her father's strength and guidance. Her once childhood sanctuary was the only place she knew she'd find it.

Rubbing the temple where she felt a headache coming on Integra wondered what she was going to do with all the men in her life. - A bunch of twats if you asked her- They were suffocating with their melodrama and childish fits. It took every ounce of control not to scream and rip her hair out in their presence.

Thinking of childish fits Alucard's most recent outburst had been exceptionally nasty. The objective it seemed of showing her those vulgar images was to upset her. Too bad for him and his plans she was above those things.

'God', she thought, 'was he really that insecure? To think I would betray him?'

After all they had been through for him to not trust her. She had thought he knew her better than that.

Integra considered how her father would handle a juvenile vampire but quelled the idea. Alucard had probably believed he knew her father also and look where that got him. Tossed aside like some forgotten relic. Maybe even at the counsels wishes. Even tortured Integra vowed to never reveal this but she understood the hurt he must have felt. Alucard always talked about her father and Walter as friends, yet what kind of friend locks you away? Alucard had ever right to be mad. To the vampire history was repeating itself.

That did not excuse him from being a jerk though.

Lazily Integra stroked the worn leather surface of the arm rest. Inhaling deeply, Arthur's pleasant smoky sent wafted to her nose incasing her in a blanket of warmth. So many years and it still smelled exactly the same as if he had just been sitting there. The aroma was reassuring.

Next to the chair sat a brandy glass and empty canter. Young Hellsing smiled remembering how he would sit here at times, glass in hand lecturing his daughter, listening to how her day went. Integra nuzzled the leather, the spicy undertones of alcohol tickling her nose. In front of the glass sat the box which gave her father his exotically rich ashen scent. A silver box, a gift from her mother, which housed the imported Italian cigarillo's he sometimes smoked or would offer to company. Playfully her fingers found the latch and lifted the lid. Taking one out she twirled it in her fingers before tucking it under her nose to breathe in its stench. Tucking her legs to her chest Integra curled into herself all the scents combined creating an illusion that her father held her in the warmth of the chair.

Comforted by these thoughts Integra's eyes dropped until she was nestled peacefully in sleep.

* * *

That's how Alucard found his master a few hours later when he decided she had enough time to cool down. He wasn't there to apologize, before coming he had determined his anger had been just. How dare Integra stand there acting like nothing had happened? Granted nothing had, Alucard was unable to ask his question before resentment took over; still she should have known. Seeing her, a fury of emotions, that stubborn set in her jaw… The creature knew the little girl would take her chance at power; it was what he would have done after all.

Alucard slowly opened his eyes as he walked out of the shadows. Arthur's room was dim with only a solitary lamp to chase the night into the corners. Yet his young master sat sleeping by the window as far away as possible from the protecting light. A devilish sneer graced his impassive features as he took the site in. She seemed so serene, so tranquil. It made him sick. Why did she get to sleep peacefully? The vampire wanted so badly to shake her awake and demand an answer to the question he had yet to voice. Apprehension of the young girl's response however stayed his actions and instead Alucard chose to wait for her to wake up on her own.

* * *

Integra stretched letting out a big yawn as she unfolded her body from the chair. The nap left her invigorated and refreshed, just what she had needed to clear her mind and regain control of her mental faculties.

Almost skipping to her father's closet and fingering the brass latch, young Hellsing felt like a new woman. Nothing, man or monster would stop her now. Upon awaking she had determined her new course of action.

'Let those bastards try and hold me.'

With the slightest touch the closet door fell open and squeaked just a hair. Although it had been a few years since the armoire had last been unlocked it still smelled like Arthur just like everything else in the room. Giddy Integra flung it open and grabbed the first object her hand touched. A white dress shirt starched at the collar with silver buttons. She fingered the material feeling the weave as she rubbed her thumb repeatedly over the soft cloth, endanger of leaving a bald spot when she was done. It was a simple shirt really, a fine cotton with an obviously high thread count. Just the thing her father would wear. She buried her face in the shirt hoping to extract the last bit of comfort. It was almost time for her to stop reminiscing and get back to work.

"Having a nice night?" Came the refined purr of her servant. Integra winced while mentally scolding herself for having been caught flitting about like some home sick adolescent. Slowly she turned in the direction of the voice; firmly placing the scowl she had been perfecting to mask her embarrassment. The creases deepened though when she saw where Alucard was. At some point he had settled himself on her father's bed propping his back up with the head board. On his lap was some random book he had been flipping through prior to her awakening.

"I came to see how you were doing but I seem to have interrupted something. I guess I'll leave." He sneered.

"It's alright Alucard, you can stay. You've already ruined the moment." The dress shirt slipped through her fingers like sand and pooled on the floor. Taking care to step over it she took a few paces closer to the bed.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" She asked bluntly, wanting to get this conversation over with.

Lacing his fingers behind his head Alucard shrugged as if the discussion was already boring him. "You said you'd think about it."

* * *

-A few hours ago at the Convention of Twelve-

_"Sir Integra I fear you do not understand the gravity of the situation."__ The __Knight__ before Integra was yelling at her now as if by raising his voice and slamming his fist on the table in a display of dominance would change her mind._

_She raised a weary hand at the speaker tired of having the same conversation. From the moment __the young member __took__ her chair the topic of the night was her abdicating as Leader of the Hellsing organization. Each __member of the Convention of Twelve took turns making her feel worse than she already __was. __Some yelled__ in distain, cheeks puffed out with faces turning tomato red. Others tried a more comforting approach trying to convince __her this__ option was for her benefit. __A few, like Sir Islands only told her what a horrible job she had done._

_"I'__m sorry to give you cause to believe I do not grasp the seriousness of your __accusations__, but I refuse to let the __recent __nights activities sway my __decision__ No one but the Queen can order me down.__"_

_"__Damnit__ you stubborn woman!__ Your actions have humiliated __this __institute__. How can you sit there so__-so__ cold… you__'__r__e__ unfit to lead the Hellsing organization."_

_"You lack experience."__ Other__s__ piped in while a few nodded in consent._

_"Well I cannot __gain__ experience with you all ordering me to the side lines.__As bad as the situation was __the enemy was contained __and we have learned from our mistakes. Last night's events will not be repeated."_

_"Of course__ Sir Integra__, but perhaps it would be better if someone __were__ to help you."__ Sir __Penwood__ interjected. Integra thought he was an ok chap, a little too passive and tolerant for her taste.__ Still she was grateful he __was on her side._

_"I do have help."_

_"The help you speak of is an abomination, a mockery to all your family has stood for.__"_

_"I never knew you felt that way about Walter__ Sir __Hedgebrook__."_

_"You know whom I speak of! Without that thing you'd be nothing." He hissed._

_"__I think we all need a moment to calm ourselves.__" __Sir Islands__ sharp __tenor comments__ broke the fight up. "__However s__peaking about your pet monster, we would like to ask why you haven't __sealed__ the vampire away again like your father. It is an unstable weapon that should not be used so __frivolously__. "_

_Sir Islands waited for a response but when it was clear the__ young Knight was not in the moo__d to provide an answer he continued._

_"Your father knew what unleashing the monster could do to the world. He had the foresight to contain him, lock him away__ before he could cause serious damage__. We want you to consider the same Integra. Locking away the creature now would also be a good way of showing your willingness to __amend your earlier mistakes__a__ good gesture on your part.__"_

_Integra lowered her eyes unwilling to make contact __with these vultures__"__Of course I'll think on these matters you have brought up gentlemen. I will carefully consider all that has been said today__ and give each judgment the careful consideration it deserves__."_

* * *

"Your right and I gave that thought the full two seconds it deserved."

"What did you decide?" Alucard pulled his hat down to shield his eyes then defensively crossed his arms to his chest. He wanted to believe she'd never turn on him like her father, but he had made the mistake before. He needed to hear it from her mouth. Somehow hearing the words would make it more tangible.

"Cowards, to fear an insignificant vampire such as yourself." Beneath the brim of his hat Alucard's eyes shown at her attempt to mock him and together they shared a silent laugh. "Don't worry, if you ever betrayed us, or I thought you getting out of control I'd kill you myself."

"I'll hold you to that promise."

Then Integra's mouth turned downward and her eyes lost their mirth.

"Why aren't you mad? My family locked you away, discarded you."

"Your father was a smart man; he had the wisdom to know he could not contain me forever. That, if given the chance I'd turn on him. He made the right choice."

"You must hate me…"

Tilting his head with a cocky grin Alucard looked upon her curious at her choice of words. She had not referred to her family but was instead concerned about how he viewed her. It was almost touching to have her concerned about his feelings. That she valued his opinion of her. "No" He curtly said already tired of the topic but decided further explanation was in order when he saw her disbelief.

"Because you're mine, my master, my commander, my sweet, sweet little girl."

"Please I'm practically an adult. I even now carry the official title of Sir."

"Have I taught you nothing?" Alucard's tone was placid but saturated in venom. For added emphasis he swung his legs over the side of the bed tossing the book aside and shook his head in disgust at her juvenile ideas of authority. "If you want power take it. No title, no piece of paper or act of God will change a man's heart."

He'd never tell her, it was something she would have to figure out alone but Integra was already worth a thousand of those so called men she compared herself too, worth more to him even than Abraham. "It's disgusting begging for their respect."

Pinching the bridge of her nose the young girl let out an exasperated sigh. He sure knew how to get worked up over nothing. "Father how'd you do it?" She asked the empty room.

Arthur had always been so stoic, so commanding. How did he not snap?

Integra was not so foolish as to believe she knew everything about her father. The man she knew was quite and dignified but there were times when he laughed or she caught him wistfully glancing at a woman passing by that Integra knew her father had been so much more. That whatever he had been in his past he had given it all up, not for her sake but for the sake of the country, for Queen and duty.

History was littered with men and women like her father; people who surrendered one thing to obtain another. Now it seemed the new Hellsing leader was faced with the same dilemma. She had to become stronger, worthy of the power granted her in name and title. Integra had a choice to make, what would she give up? She had no friends or family so no sacrifice was needed there. She considered herself rational and mature for her age and she had no vices to speak of. Sure she could win the conventions favor by locking Alucard away but that was already out of the equation. What was left to give? What had others given up before her?

"Can I ask you something Alucard?"

He didn't move so she took his silence as consent.

"I don't understand, you were human once." She took a step closer, scrutinizing him with her hard azure eyes as if the answer could be found on his person.

There was a pause. Alucard could not help thinking this was more of a statement than a question – and almost told her so - but decided to relent and confirm her accusations.

"Yes."

"You loved once." Another step.

"Yes."

"What happened? What turned your heart to ash? Did you forget how it felt?"

"No."

"Did you forget her?" This step had Integra leaning down so both where eye level with each other. A sense of unease at her proximity was quickly tossed aside as Alucard recognized it as a useless sensation. It did not help though that the monster felt trapped watching vulnerable cherry lips purse in a meditated frown.

"Never." Alucard blamed the crack in his voice on account of his mouth being dry.

Quickly Integra shot up, resting a fist under her chin deep in contemplation; letting his answer roll around her head, testing it, seeing if it made sense. If he remembered everything, how it felt –most importantly how he once loved- the pain, agony, immense joy and immeasurable sorrows of life, how could he do the things he had done?

"I became a monster." He smiled like a Cheshire cat as his master jumped startled she had received an answer.

"You were also a man."

"Maybe I wasn't that good of a man." Slyly he slipped his hands back behind his head, a toothy grin sweeping his mouth, as he lay back on the bed.

Slowly Integra put the puzzle together reconstructing his sacrifice for supremacy. In his own lecture Alucard admitted no act of God could change his heart. God must have cursed him only with immortality to give him time to realize his crimes. It was his own convictions that made him a demon. He chose to drink the blood of the fallen. It was his own choice to feel no guilt for the lives he took. He gave up his humanity to obtain a chance at ultimate power.

In the back of her mind she heard a gruff voice say, 'does it scare you?'

'No.'

They stayed in companionable silence for awhile until Integra decided to begin a new topic.

"I love my father…But I meant it when I said I hated him for leaving. Sometimes I wonder if he knew he was leaving me in a pit of jackals."

"One word and I can kill them for you. No one would have to know."

"Everything's so simple for you."

"Humans over complicate everything. If some ones standing in your way; move them."

"At least my father did something right." Integra spun around her skirt billowing with the force of the movement and plopped down on an unoccupied section of the bed.

"Oh and what might that be?"

Jabbing a finger into his ribs for his snobbish tone Integra observed the vampire, wondering how to convey what she felt. She wanted to say thank you for all he had done. In his own sick twisted way Alucard watched over her. He pushed her to the limit but never gave her more than she could handle. He taught her to be sane in a world of madness. So many little things, like how he'd lurk in a corner just so she'd know she was not alone. Or say some vulgar comment to get her mind off some worry. Dutifully he had picked up her training where her father had left off. Part of who she was today was thanks to the monster before her. However thank you just didn't seem to cut it.

Impishly she flicked the wide brim of his hat then carelessly tossed it off. "I told you not to wear it inside." She grinned as he began growling his annoyance at her actions. Alucard started to shift ready to get up and grab his poor abused hat, yet a strong hand on his chest where his heart should be kept him firmly in place. He looked up to see Integra with a serious expression on her face. Brushing loose strands of hair from his eyes the creature was caught off guard when his little girl bent down and placed a chastised kiss at the corner of his mouth.

It was brief, hardly passionate or intimate. More like a child kissing their parents good night but to a monster the kiss spoke volumes. She might as well have declared war on her Queen. For what Integra just did went beyond blasphemy.

As quickly as it happened Integra was back to her original position looking at him with all the innocence and wide eyed glee she possessed.

"He left me with you." She finally replied to his earlier question.

Looking at her servant the young Hellsing leader came to her decision. If all she had to sacrifice was herself, than that's what she would do. Mind, body and soul. She'd give it all until nothing was left as long as she could stand beside her monster.

"Alucard I…" She choked on her sorrow at the realization of what this meant. Unable to finish her thought.

'To hell with it he knows.'

At first Alucard was in shock, he just laid there emotionless wondering if what happened had been real. Replaying the moment in his mind he concluded yes, this was no hoax, the leader of the Hellsing organization, a protestant knight had kissed him. Now it seemed she was about to cry. Unable to think of an appropriate explanation for her irrational behavior Alucard tentatively brought a gloved hand up to her forehead to check for a fever.

The kind gesture made Integra blush and strengthened the resolve for what she planned on doing next. Placing a knee to rest against the bed she slid her body closer to his. This would be her last opportunity to do something rash before she gave it all up. So the young teenage girl decided she might as well make it memorable.

In a graceful motion Integra swung her other leg around so she was now straddling his hips. Leaning over him her soft straw colored hair tumbled loosely against his neck veiling the two in their own private world. Tenderly she placed her burning forehead against his own cool milky skin while her fingers delicately played across his cheeks. It was now or never. Integra had never kissed a man before…she hoped it was worth it.

Alucard waited in anticipation for what he knew was to come. Already the blood had rushed to her face igniting her like white heat from within, causing the soft tint of her lips to darken with passion. He was a little disappointed he'd be unable to look into her eyes -seeing how her eyes were shut tight- but this way suited him better since his master would be unable to see the smile her actions brought to him. It was unexpected moments like these that made damnation worth it.

Hesitantly Integra leaned in further and this time kissed him on the lips. The contact between them was soft at first; she did not know what to expect kissing a No Life King. The initial shock of coming into contact with a freezing mouth had her gasping for air like one would after stepping into an icy stream. However she had felt a subtleness to his lips she decided she liked and deepened the kiss, offering to warm his lips with hers.

Accepting the offer Alucard returned the favor by brushing a canine against her bottom lip. Integra squirmed but a quick hand placed at the base of her neck kept her from breaking away. He nipped at the sensitive flesh earning a faint moan from his master's throat. He felt her lips part in a shy smile and he knew without a doubt what an evil being he was. With her tender lips pressed against his, he'd never stop to say this was wrong or that she was too young. If he was a better man, a real man he'd pull away. Lucky for him he was neither of those things; He was a monster so he held on.

When Integra finally broke away and their mouths separated Alucard frowned at the sudden loss of contact. He wasn't done yet, he did not want her to leave because he knew when she left this would never happen again and there was more to do. Taking the opportunity their current positions presented him Alucard quickly sat up and pulled her back to the bed. This time it would be Integra against the sheets on the receiving end of a kiss.

Unlike his master Alucard was not nervous about what he was doing. Where she had been gentle and inexperienced Alucard showed her what it was to be passionate and fierce. His kiss was made to leave bruises; after all if this was his one chance the vampire refused to hold back.

So he pushed into her mouth until her lips parted with the force of the kiss allowing his tongue to advance further in. Together they explored their new findings taking in the others taste while reveling in the coarse actions. It was a sensation that had them both groping for more.

For Alucard the excitement did not end there. All around him he could hear her intake of air, the rush of blood quickening the pulse. The sounds of the night, which the vampire took the most satisfaction in, were being pummeled by the hurried breaths and throaty pants of an adolescent girl. The slamming of her heart beat became his, her breath began to fill his lungs. He felt her all around him, teasing him with the slightest graze of her tongue or the faintest sweeps of her fingers through his hair.

Alucard wanted her to moan louder for him, to fill the room with her screams, so he brushed his fangs across the line of her jaw until his teeth where resting next to her ear. Eagerly he bit down on the exposed flesh, hard enough to be rewarded with a rasping yelp but not enough to draw blood. He placed his lips at the newest mark he had given her feeling the roar of her pulse beat against him. It was a strong rhythm, giving him pleasure knowing he had been the one to create it, not out of fear but from some form of intimacy. With her lithe form writhing beneath him Alucard realized her had forgotten how it felt.

This time when he captured her mouth again it was not as rough. It was almost tender except for the claws gripping desperately at Integra's back.

Integra felt the hunger and need behind the force of his menstruations and pulled Alucard further down by the collar of his coat. She found herself just as greedy as him, hungrily seeking his fleeting caress. Having him above her was sending the little Hellsing into a tail spin. It was all too much, he was too much. She swore she felt every touch, every fiber of cloth, every pin prick of light. The sheets beneath her scratched at her exposed legs while his kisses fell like jack hammers across her responsive flesh.

This she concluded had been worth it and she wanted to experience more.

Reaching behind her back she pried a gloved hand from where he had been holding her. Bringing his hand to rest against her cheek she nestled against the palm before nipping at his wrist.

Intrigued by her actions Alucard momentarily stopped the onslaught of her mouth to see what Integra planned next. Looking up he saw she no longer kept her eyes closed revealing to him burning mirrors of blue. Through her eyes he saw himself, what she was seeing through the haze of lust. A devil among men, a murderer of innocence, an untamed beast; Integra had no delusions of what he was. Yet she still loved him, even forgave him, not despite of what he was but because of that.

Although he knew this would never go past tonight he would admit just this once he had loved her from the moment he heard her cry.

Alucard noticed while he had been reflecting on the situation a slender leg began to slide between them, up his outer thigh, stopping after finding its place at the base of his waist. He followed Integra's direction as she took his hand and deposited it on the underside of her leg. Slowly she guided his hand past the folds of her skirt, along the curve of her thigh, until it rested against her rear. After making sure he was not going anywhere she let his hand go and wrapped both arms around his neck entangling her fingers in his hair. In a fluid movement she pushed forward, arching back, rolling her hips along his groin.

It was a lingering migration causing Alucard to throw his head back in a guttural snarl.

Not one to be out matched, he reciprocated the motion by pulling her pelvis back against him with one hand firmly clutching her rear and drove his covered member between her quivering thighs. At first the movement was deep but with each pant from her now swollen mouth he felt the ache in his loins grow and began grinding into her harder splaying random kisses across her face, down her neck, even her forehead.

The monster could not help thinking how supple she was against his hard body, as if she was made to fit in his arms. With that thought Alucard rammed his elongated shaft further against her heated center. She was made for him. His mouth traveled further down her body until the rapid rise of her chest brought her breast brushing against his lips. He bit down on the offered flesh and tugged at the firm mound between layers of cloth leaving tiny slits where his teeth had been.

Integra dug her nails into his scalp, rocking into his thrust as a husky whimper racked her throat. Then the sensation of his teeth digging into sensitive skin knocked the wind from her lungs. She inhaled choking for air never able to get enough.

Realizing this was about to cross a line that should have never been touched she relented and knew this had to end before her plans went to waste. Integra raked her fingers down to the base of his neck and sunk her nails in further. Hooking a leg behind his knee she pushed into his next thrust while rolling to the side. Once again she had him pinned to the bed her body shaking above his.

The monster watched mesmerized as her chest heaved with the rhythmic intake of breath, her knuckles turning white where she gripped the collar of his shirt. Sensual lips parted trying to find the ability to speak but only breathy pants would form.

In his life Alucard had feared one thing, God. Now undead he had nothing to fear because God had already abandoned him. At least that's what had been his understanding until now. This one scrawny little girl, a tangle of limbs and hair above him made him tremble like no god could; for God was merciful while she held the capacity for immeasurable cruelty. So he feared to hear what she had to say, what losing contact would mean for the two. Somehow this felt like a good bye and Alucard did not like the way their brief encounter was ending.

Tracing his thumb over the battered part of her lower lip he tried to sit back up but she twisted his collar with such force it would have choked a normal man, slamming him back down by the throat.

Softly Integra smiled and bit the tip of his finger at the entrance to her mouth. "This is the only part of me they cannot have."

With that said she swiftly rose from the bed and pulled her blouse up over her head. Tossing it on the floor with her father's shirt she reached into the armoire and pulled a crisp replacement out.

Bewildered Alucard turned to watch her change; wistfully remembering every curve of her body, counting every scar on her back. Until the new shirt was pulled into place signifying the end.

Knowing their informal time together was over Alucard took up his former visual by lacing his fingers behind his head. The indifferent mask he commonly wore slipped back on as if nothing had happened.

Taking note of the rest of the display he noticed Integra's skirt came next which was carelessly flung with no concern to where it landed. Against her thigh he saw a hand sized bruise where he must have squeezed a bit too hard and he smirked inwardly. It stroked his ego to know he had left evidence of their tryst speckled across her body. At least for the next few days there would be no denying what they had done.

Once the skirt was gone Integra opted for a pair of green slacks and jacket to match. It was a hideous color concealing her thin frame in an outfit three sizes too big, hiding all traces of femininity making her appear androgynous. If it wasn't for her long hair one might mistake her for Arthur's son instead of daughter.

Quietly ignoring the glares from the monster still on the bed Integra walked over to the table with the cigar box and picked out a cigarillo for herself. Snatching the lighter kept in the container Integra prepared for a new day of work. It was her hope that with these mementos from her father's room she would remind the other members of who she was and the authority being the child of Arthur Hellsing held.

'Oh yes, how cruel my little girl can be', Alucard reflected closing his churning red eyes on her retreating form. Why couldn't she have stayed his little girl forever?

"Let me turn you." He said, nothing in his tone betrayed the panic gripping his blackened heart.

Integra stopped at the door twirling the cigar between her fingers. Her mouth twitched with the slightest of smiles. Leisurely as if contemplating a response she placed the thin cigar between trembling lips.

"No…" Finally came her languid reply as she lit the cigarillo. "You wouldn't love me if I changed."

With nothing left to say she walked away unable to bear turning around and facing him. One look and she knew the frail wall holding back her heart would crack. This would be her sacrifice, Integra told herself, to give up the affection and comfort of another person - or in her case monster -, to forgo her femininity, to abandon her dreams. Soon he'd understand, they all would, what she was willing to sacrifice. She'd steal her heart against the scrutiny of the world and gladly become what they called her behind her back The Iron Maiden.

They called her cold now she scoffed…she was about to show them Antarctica. She'd become untouchable, a woman to fear. Her name, her family's name, would send the hearts of men and monsters quacking.

With a new attitude learned from her servant, a new suit given by her dad, Integra could not wait to tell the Convention of her decision.

The End. No more. Fin.

I am done with this one people! You tell me how I did. Cause damned if I know.


End file.
